Saturday, September 14, 2019

McCain's Choice and Shonda's Bunyans -archive from 9/2/08

Dear Curt,

How do you feel about McCain's choice of an Alaskan politician for VP? I know you were born in Alaska and might have some insight.

-Bristol in Anchorage

Dear Bristol,

I was indeed born in Alaska, but haven't lived there in a long time. I've seen the pictures and frankly, based just on those pictures I think she's a great choice. She looks pretty hot, and seeing that she always wears glasses, she must be pretty smart too! Yeah, I thought I had a chance to be picked, but I'm pretty busy doing my charitable work, cooking, taking care of the kids, shaving Shonda's bunyons and "rehabbing" my shoulder. I don't think I could have slotted "VP stuff" in there as well. I'll tell you what though, if Palin needs me to help her probe any of the country's problems like pre-marital sex and how to handle her own teenaged girl. I mean, really, you're the governor of Alaska and your daughter is out getting knocked up in the back of some ice fisherman's 1973 Ford Pickup? What's up with that? I certainly hope the nanny was on vacation when that went down. Otherwise, time to hire a new one...

Personally, I think an actual NATIVE Alaskan whose kids aren't pregnant would have been a better choice, but I suppose I'm just a dumb jock...Either way, I'll be voting for John McCain and Sarah Palin and I suggest you do the same, unless you are down with poverty and converting to Muslim-ism.

Politically yours,
Sarah Palin

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